When it comes to seducing a woman, your attitude plays a significant role in your success or failure.
A guy with a positive attitude is more likely to attract women than a guy with a negative attitude. Being optimistic and upbeat can be seen in almost everything you do, as can being pessimistic and glum. Women are much more likely to prefer optimistic, upbeat men.
First and foremost, a positive attitude reflects confidence and self-esteem. As previously mentioned, self-esteem and trust are important. A good outlook often has a direct impact on how other people feel when they are in your presence. Have you ever had a friend or coworker who was always negative or pessimistic? Did you find that after a while, his or her mood began to make you feel down, anxious, or irritable? It’s likely that it’s happened to both of us. So, remember, if only to avoid becoming a dark cloud over everyone’s head, do your hardest to be optimistic and have a good attitude.
However, it goes far deeper than that. Being pessimistic will not help you make a good first impression on a woman. You must first feel good before you can make anyone feel good. You must exude the same emotions that you wish to receive. If you’re not sending out good vibes, we’ll notice and most likely avoid you.
The bottom line is that women want to find a man who is stable. Your job is one of the factors that women consider when determining their security. No, this does not imply that you must be a rocket scientist. Simply put, if you’re changing jobs every couple of months or getting fired for a bad attitude or poor results, all of which are directly influenced by your attitude, we’ll think twice before getting involved with you. Remember, women want a partner; a 50/50 partnership.
It can be a totally mind-blowing experience to see a guy in a bar approach a girl he doesn’t know and make out with her almost instantly. A special skill or superpower that someone is born with can appear magical or out of control.
However, this is not the case. It can also be broken down into a few basic steps that you can take to achieve the same results. I’m going to break down those steps in this post.
What Do You Do?
This is where the most advanced frame control is used. If you want to come across as a pro at this, you need to know how to control someone else’s frame.
I’m referring to their “truth” when I say “frame.” You have the complete power of what they go through. To really get her to the point where she feels comfortable making out with you right away, you must be able to maintain control of the situation.
I’ll show you how to do it in a very fast, punchy, and efficient manner. I’ll clarify it as quickly as possible so you can try it right away…
Here’s what I’d mean exactly as I’d say it… When you approach a girl and she makes eye contact with you, slowly bring your finger up to your lips and whisper, “Shhh…”
Then deepen your vocal tonality and slow down your speech pattern. “Wait just a moment,” you reply quickly.
“Stop for one minute,” you may also suggest. I recommend employing some NLP techniques in this situation. When someone hears the words “stop,” “wait,” or “don’t,” they automatically register what follows.
So, what do you do if I say, “Don’t think of a black cat?” You immediately conjure up images of a black cat or whatever version of the one you have in mind.
So if I say, “Don’t try to make out with me,” or “Don’t make out with me right now,” girls will hear, “Don’t try to make out with me,” but their subconscious minds will hear, “Make out with me right now!”
You’re attempting to use a real-life version of Inception to convince her that you’re her idea. “I should make out with this man,” she should be saying.
Now, in order to get this to go as quickly as possible, you’ll be using a lot of these subconscious stimuli during frame control. Please only use this for positive purposes. This can be used in a variety of nefarious ways.
If a woman doesn’t want to be seduced, don’t try to seduce her. One of the reasons it’s so important to notice a woman who really wants to be seduced by a man is because of this.
So, to summarize: you approach her, place your finger over your lips and tell her to “Shhh” for a second, then say something that begins with “don’t,” “wait,” or “stop.”
“Don’t worry… right now,” I usually say. That’s everything I have to say about it. “Don’t…worry……….. right now,” I say as I slow down my expression.
Then I immediately proceed to the next sentence, which is, “We’re going to keep a secret from each other. We’re going to kiss in secret, and no one will notice.”
And when I say this, I’m leaning in… and when you do it, you’ll be doing the same. You’re leaning in slowly and steadily. You’re gazing from her eyes to her lips and back up to her eyes at the same time.
This is referred to as “triangulating.” Count to three when looking into her eyes, then down to her lips and count to two, up to three, down to two, up to three, down to two, up to three, down to two, up to three, down to two, up to three, down to two, up to three, down to two, up to three, down to two, up to three, down Do it three or four times when you’re speaking.
Since there is a lot to learn, you can practice a little. I don’t think you’ll get it right the first time around.
So, you say it again, “We’re going to keep something hidden from each other. We’re going to kiss and no one would be the wiser.” From here on out, you’re just filling in the gaps with words while leaning in to maintain control of the conversation.
But you’re going to reach around her back with your right or left hand – whichever is more available – very slowly. You won’t pull her in or anything at this point; only gently touch her.
The first step is to recognize that the ability to spot a woman who is ready to make out accounts for around 90% of the difference between someone who is very good with women and someone who isn’t so good or mediocre with women.
It may seem strange at first, but it is real. Your chances of success drop dramatically if you walk into a bar and approach some woman without knowing what signs to look for.
You must be able to recognize a woman who is already in a “make-out ready” state so that you can approach her and be “that person.”
Don’t believe the stereotype that women don’t want this to happen to them.
Women are just as sexual (if not more so) than men. Since so many guys are scared to go for it, this “turbo” make-out session almost never happens. When this doesn’t happen, the girls end up going home alone or, worse, sitting in the bar and being a little rude to a lot of the guys/being resentful and frustrated that no one approaches them.
You want to learn how to see the woman that you can make out within a minute or less in the first place by putting this strategy into practice.
There are a few excellent indicators that will tell you if a woman is game or ready for an instant make-out session (especially in a bar setting).
What Do You Look For?
The first sign is a woman who always looks down. A woman’s feelings are accessed as she looks down often.
Allow me to elaborate… Different sections of our brain are accessed as we look in different directions. “Eye Accessing Cues” is what they’re called. When a woman is looking down in a bar, she is accessing her emotional brain.
“I have an emotional reaction to you looking at me, and I’m looking down,” she says if she makes eye contact with you, looks down, and looks up again. And if she tilts her head down as well (rather than just looking down through her eyes), she’s physically lowering herself and demonstrating submission.
You’ll be able to walk up and be the dominant guy as a result of this.
If she looks at you, smiles, and does not look away, things might get a lot more complicated. In terms of social interaction, she’s taking you on head-on rather than submitting to you right away.
Women who you can approach and make out within less than a minute should immediately assume the submissive position as a woman. That’s one attribute that indicates you’ll be able to figure her out quickly.
She also has the trait of constantly looking around in order to make eye contact. This is extremely important. A woman who is actively engaging with someone and not looking away would be more difficult to seduce in 40 seconds or less. It’ll take a lot of time.
When you walk up, you’ll have to play a completely different game this time. You can’t just approach her and start making out with her.
Instead, if you see a woman having a conversation while always looking around and trying to make eye contact with a lot of people, this is most definitely an opportunity for you, and she’s a woman you can approach and become sexual with right away.
Other characteristics can be seen in the way they move and dress. Assume she’s standing with her feet about shoulder-width apart. A woman standing like this is less likely to be open for you to approach and conquer. That’s because she’s in a commanding role, with more assertive body language, and she’ll most likely be more receptive.
Instead, you’re looking for a woman who takes up less space. Her legs are closer together, and she seems to be outside of a party, looking around.
Another point to consider is her attire. She definitely isn’t the type of girl you can walk up to and make out within a minute if she’s dressed in a way that’s crazy flashy and attracting a lot of publicity.
This type of woman is looking for love, not to be dominated by anyone. You want someone who is somewhere between “I don’t give a damn” and “Stare at my tits, slut!” Somewhere between going to the bar in sweatpants and an elastic waistband and looking very, really good and sexy in a low-cut top. You’re looking for someone who falls somewhere in the middle of those two extremes.
This category includes a large number of vacationing women. They don’t want to overdress or underdress, and they have no idea what the bar environment would be like. They’ll normally come in with an open mind and begin searching around for links. This is a fantastic opportunity for you (and her, of course).
That’s what you should be looking for and how you’ll recognize her in the first place. You should keep an eye on her if you see any of those. If you believe she is the kind of person you can approach and do this with, go ahead.
If not, I’d advise you to go ahead and do it anyway, just to see what happens.
After you’ve finished that and seen your girl (there are usually three or four of these girls in a bar at any given time), you’ll walk up and begin the scary portion.
Signs That It’s Getting the Job Done
Is she staring at your mouth? You have permission to proceed if she is staring at your lips. If she’s staring into your eyes, you can either wait a second or turn around and try it again.
This, in a sense, resets the meter in her head. Most people consider turning around and turning back to be a new beginning in a discussion. It’s a curious psychological flaw.
That is, for some reason, how we are as humans. When someone walks away and then returns, we owe them a second chance to move forward. So, if you’re having trouble, turn around, turn around, smile, and keep going. If she continues to resist you, you should probably back off and look for another woman.
Proceed if she is staring at your lips and seems to be at ease and enthusiastic. You’ll close the distance between you and her and speak almost directly into her ear.
If you’re in a noisy setting, such as a pub, talk louder but don’t raise your voice. Reduce the volume of your voice to the point that you must be very close to her ear to be heard.
Then you’ll continue to talk… I typically say something along these lines: “This isn’t going to be seen by anyone. It’ll just be a little secret between us. I promise I won’t tell anyone unless you promise not to tell anyone as well.”
I make sure she can feel my breath on her neck as I say this into her ear. So, as I talk, I’m breathing out a little bit more than normal so she can feel the hot air on her skin.
When you do this, women typically respond with a visceral, deep, sexual reaction.
You’ll slowly rub your cheek against hers as you speak very close to her ear. Then you’ll move your head closer to hers and begin kissing her.
And if you do it correctly, you’ll start with just one soft peck and then move on to making out. Although it might not seem so in this definition, 40 seconds is a significant amount of time. This step can be completed in a fraction of a second – I’ve done it in less time and seen other guys do it as well.
It should be practiced.
What I’d like you to do is put this strategy into effect. Try for a minute or two at first, and then get to the point where you can do it in 40 (or even 30) seconds.
This isn’t a strategy you’ll use on a regular basis. However, including this in your seduction arsenal is extremely useful when the opportunity arises. To put it another way, you want to make sure you have the right equipment for the job.
If you beat around the bush, indulge in small talk, or otherwise waste time with a girl who is in that state and ready to be seduced, she will be turned off, and you will have missed a golden seduction opportunity.
Instead, you want to be able to see her, know that’s what she wants, and go in and give it to her right away when you see it. This is the main difference between guys who are rock stars at approaching and seducing a woman… and guys who wish they were great at doing so quickly.
There are several other factors that contribute to performance. There are basic NLP triggers that you can use to communicate to make sure she’s really in your zone. There are strategies about how to talk in the right tonality… how to touch her in a way that makes her feel relaxed and doesn’t turn off any of her odd alert switches.
Knowing a lot of shortcuts like this and knowing when to use them is what’s taken me from a regular guy to a well-respected dating coach. These shortcuts can also help you strengthen your relationship with women.
Remember these traits in women who want to be seduced, and keep in mind that you can make out with a woman in under a minute.
Confidence is important when dating (or even seducing) a woman. Women always associate “self-confidence” with “ability to succeed.” While many men assume that successful men attract women because they are more likely to gain more money, this is simply not the case.
Although it might seem obvious, women prefer successful men because they are more likely to be happy. So you’re still wondering what a happy man has to do with it. Allow me to demonstrate. Women understand that men who are happy with themselves are less likely to look for others to make them happy and are more secure.
And in a relationship, this means a man is less likely to lie, change jobs often, or get himself into a variety of other potentially dangerous circumstances. Bear in mind that most women want a man who will be both their partner and their boyfriend.
They need a partner not only for companionship, decision-making, and financial matters but also in the bedroom. To effectively seduce a woman, you must make her feel as though you are on equal footing.
When it comes to faith, it seems that there are two groups of people: those who possess it and those who lack it. Although this can seem to be true on the surface, everybody has the ability to be “self-assured,” or inspired, however, you prefer.
Take comfort in the fact that you’re a decent guy, intelligent, funny, good at your work, caring, considerate, or whatever other positive character traits you possess. It’s comforting to note that not all women strive to be CEOs or brain surgeons. They simply want a man who is confident in himself, his experience, and what he can bring to a relationship with them!
Men and women flirt in different ways, for different motives, and with different expectations. However, if you ignore the result and flirt simply to be polite, you can open yourself up to new possibilities. You might find a new lover, but if that doesn’t work out, you might meet someone who becomes a good friend, and you never know who she might introduce you to. Maintain a flexible mindset.
Give her a drink after you’ve shared looks and smiles around a room and you’re pretty certain she feels she’d like to hear more about you. But keep in mind that what you’re getting is a drink. Don’t expect her to come crashing down at your feet. It’s often enough to simply give someone a drink, watch as she accepts it and smiles, then look away, returning later to show your interest.
If you’re invited to her table, focus on the talk rather than on landing a date with her. Long before they go out with someone, most women want to know what kind of person they’re going out with. Before you go on a date, make an effort to get to know her and give her the opportunity to get to know you.
Never approach two women in the same party at the same time. No woman desires to be second best. Avoid addressing people in the same party one after the other. You tend to be a loser, and women can believe you are desperate for a port in a storm. And if you are, keep it hidden.
Make certain that every compliment you give to a woman is real. Nothing is more annoying than someone who uses a lot of exaggerated language. Everyone has something positive about them; take note of it and sincerely praise them.
Never place your hands on a woman without her permission. Some women are unconcerned with ‘touchy feely’ experiences, while others are appalled. Respect the person before you have had the chance to learn more about her. Touching can be a lovely flirty gesture, but it should be limited to the arms or resting the hand just above the arms before you learn more. By moving closer, watching the reactions, and then moving back a little to eliminate the hazard, you can measure the personal room.
Always be respectful of yourself. Women are often drawn to men who are only a little bit out of control. Avoid hovering, groveling, or acting desperate. Consider yourself special, and know that you are worthy of nothing but the best.
Ok, she said yes to a second date, this doesn’t mean you two are exclusive. So don’t get too excited and start shouting from every rooftop, that she’s your girl. I know plenty of guys that will do just about anything to keep a woman… The point is this, we have all been there guys. So what do we do?
Well, don’t become Mr. Cling that’s what we’re not going to do. A few girls may like it, but typically it’s a BIG NO NO… It’s not good pinning your hopes and fantasies all on this one girl so soon, and she shouldn’t do that to you, as well. It can be a big turn-off and feel desperate to the other person who begins to see you as the “creepy clingy dude”. Look at it from her point of you, would you want the same thing? Would you want to feel like she’s the “weird clingy girl”? Because you would more than likely cut her off, correct? So stay away from being too territorial no matter what stage of the relationship you’re in, especially in the early stage.
Dating exclusively is a huge step. No, it’s not on the level as moving in together would be, but it does represent a level of dedication and commitment and while you might think you’re ready by the second date, you’re probably not. There’s nothing wrong with being patient and getting to know each other a little better. Remember the best things come to those who wait. And it’s very true.
For some, being exclusive only takes place after several dates and long talks in which the agreement is made to only date each other, before becoming exclusive. Until then, you might want to date around for a while until you both decide that it’s time to take to the next level. Don’t forget to have fun as you’re building to point. The long phone conversations, constant texting while at work, and of course the time you two spend alone together. It’s all apart of the process.
Here are some tips that can help you stop it from getting too serious, too fast:
1. Date other women. You can still continue to date the girl you really want but remember to keep your options open just in case…
2. Use this time to get to know her better. Patience is your friend for matters like this.
3. Keep your dates fun and causal. The more laughing the better. If you have a good sense of humor and can make her laugh, she will be more open to tell more about herself. Information is important in everything we do, even falling in love.
4. If everything is going great after the first few dates, maybe it’s time to test the romantic waters. If you’ve followed the tips so far, you would be able to get a sense of if she’s ready to take it to the next level.
5. Now, after several dates, lots of texting, phone calls, and a little romance, you may feel she’s definitely the one. This may be the time to find out if she’s ready to make a commitment to you. Quite frankly if she hasn’t reached out by now, you really should find out. She could be waiting for you to make the first move, which some women do. After being with her over several months, your gut should be able to tell you. Follow your gut.
When the time is right(Trust your gut) you can start a simple conversation about dating exclusively. Hopefully, if you have done everything right you will have a pretty good idea of how she feels beforehand. If you’ve gotten this far, it’s more than likely you won’t be surprised by her answer. Good luck Gentlemen.
If you want to use the same tips I used to get the girl I wanted click here… I went from a lonely shy guy to dating every weekend. Now I’ve been happily married for over 5 years… It works Gentlemen.
Amongst the most wonderful tips, I was ever blessed with was the fact that women don’t want you to try too hard. Not a lot of guys understand this, but it will truly drive a woman wild. And please, do not overdo it. The minute you start to try too hard she will pull away from you and in turn, it will destroy your game. You must understand that everything in the world is a stage, including seduction. So, as a man do not turn women into prizes by buying them drinks, roses, taking them to expensive restaurants, and generally pampering them. You are there to seduce also, not to pick her up! That’s why it’s called the art of seduction… Right?
This is your story. But before you can get the girl you want, you must trigger the attraction within her. Only then will she allow you to march in and claim her for your own. How you proceed will have a direct impact on her development, and her ultimate goal toward that goal.
Before you can do that, however, you need to read and fully grasp this opportunity. You are not only showcasing your value, you are reaching out to her primal, innermost feelings. You’ve probably tried smooth pickup lines for her. It didn’t work, right? Well, you need more than flirty pickup lines. But don’t worry, I’ll show you how to be a player. Ok, I won’t get that far.
You will only start to really understand women and learn how to gain their attention once you learn the many signs suggested in this article. Your journey might have to be filled with many women, and each encounter, and practice that builds your confidence, and your ability to see things from a woman’s perspective. These are all the building blocks of understanding that are the keys to reaching out to a woman’s heart.
1. She must be shown how much you care, and know that she is a special woman that is different from the others.
2. Don’t just make friends, but see if there is something more there!
3. Be nice, but be respectful … and notice if she has a problem with rude behavior from you.
4. Be eager to learn … so that she can learn to like you.
5. Tell her how she has changed her life through the years and has changed it for the better.
6. Tell her interesting stories about your family and friends.
7. Ask her many questions, emote and be interested in what she is telling you.
One of the ways you must learn how to inspire a deep emotional response within her is to learn how to read her body language, rate her temperature, and have a gut feel for what she is feeling. Somehow, she must be telling you that it is ok to go into a little depth with what she is saying. This doesn’t mean telling her what we all think she wants to hear. This means being able to detect the subtle nuances in her voice, facial expressions, positioning, and posture. The difference these small cues make is the difference between a pleasant, unresolved feeling that you would like to get to know better or project her with all the joy, grace, and affection that she is feeling.
So how do you get the girl you want? There are many ways as I have stated above, but I don’t want to beat a dead horse here. Like all else, the best place to start is with great conversation. A woman isn’t going to be as interested in you if all you can talk about is your pocket protector and how great you are at your job. Conversation is a two-way process, so remember to be a great listener. Ask her questions and be truly interested in her answers. This is the best way to make her open up with you and begin to seduce her. It goes a long way.
Seduction and conversation aren’t just about the physical. Both have to be there to be effective. Conversation is about communication. It really takes nothing to learn how to talk to a woman; it is mostly about being interested. So, if you can talk to her, you can seduce her. The art of seduction or seducing a woman really begins with interest. And interest is based on being a good listener. When you are a good listener, you are naturally an interesting person yourself. You need to develop the ability to radiate the kind of interest that is being offered right back to you.
For this method to work, the reverse must also be true. You must be interested in her and the things that interest her. Find out about her and let that become your focus. Ask more about how she lives, what she does for fun, what her dreams are, etc. Curiosity is seductive, no doubt about that. Let her feel like you genuinely want to know more about her.
Remember to never overtly praise her or express affection, accomplishing this can really jack up her attraction. Affection, yet, is different from “Seduction”, as you are aiming to seduce, not just complement.
After you have made a target and learned everything you can about her, you need to keep her interested. You cannot achieve this without keeping steady attention to what does interests her. Is she enjoying her time with you? Is she enjoying your company? Do you enjoy your time together? Because if you don’t enjoy each other’s company, it will soon no longer be about your charming wit and great humor, it will be a dry and uninteresting conversation.
There are as many ways as you can think to accomplish this. Some, invest in time and energy learning a new language, culture, or hobby. Some, take the simple but powerful path of creating their own exotic tales that are romantic enough to make her stop searching out new grounds to hunt.
Your task is to bring all of these things into focus for her so that she can see the unbelievable value you present. She must be warned, however, that your intentions are friendly, but expect to see her items of clothing on the floor at the end of this process.
If after all this, you still cannot make a great impression, do not despair, or give up, because it really is possible to make an unforgettable impression. Seduction is a gradual process that begins with interest and develops through the stages of conversation and intimacy; there is no single tactic that will work in all cases. However, general ideals will always serve us.
Some signs that she is noticing your presence and is interested are:
· She looks at you when you walk past her.
· She laughs at things you say.
· She is often touching you now and then.
· She gives you her undivided attention and is a good listener.
· She plays with her hair, stroking it or touching you in a subtle way.
I hope this taught you how to get women in bed or how to get the girl you want… I used these same tactics, and now I’m happily married. Thank you, good luck, and enjoy life…